While my job search was on I had an added responsibility of revising my JAVA concepts and database concepts. The timings at my current job didn’t allow me to have control over my time. I ended up being damn tired and sapped out by the time I reached home. With low energy and low interest in studying JAVA I could not concentrate. Hence, my mind wandered around in every other direction but JAVA. Damn JAVA. A software tool which is supposed to fulfill a certain utility and does that, what is the BIG DEAL about it.
Again the next day would start at office in a hostile environment where my creativity would be underutilized and I would be forced to do stereotype work. And the mission job used to be my hand-in-hand job i.e. applying for every possible job popping in my Gmail along with assigned work. Haha!! what a waste of time and energy. Anyone who has been doing the same to get a better job would know what I am talking about. Yes, the big shot companies you apply to for a decent job do not care to reply back and those who do, they have very less to offer.
In the course of my daily mission job routine I realized my disliking for JAVA and my very job profile. My current job served as a perfect set up to bring me close to my natural myself. In no time I knew that I am not made for being a software engineer. My inner voice was telling me that even if I push myself to pursue programming as my career I won’t be able to master it. My heart is not into it.
But the next big thing is, if not an engineer then WHAT??? Trust me, finding out what you want to be in life is more difficult than climbing Mount Everest! To some it might take a lifetime to realize what they want to be. So its that difficult. I even went on to questionnaire some of my friends seeking what I can be if not a software engineer. They genuinely answered my questioned and opened various new dimensions for me. A self discovery process on the roll. One of my friends could see me as RJ 😀 Yes, radio jokey, owing to my sweet and stylish voice 😛
I am a philanthropist and likes to interact with lot of people. I often enjoy motivating and encouraging people and completely adore motivational speakers and writers. I started approaching some NGO’s with my CV with no background in sociology and psychology. Again, I saw disappoints only.
I found that I have natural affinity towards reading since childhood and I never gave a serious thought to it. I am never distracted by anything whatsoever while I am reading. I like to read everything including leadership blogs, fiction, non-fiction, almost everything. I complete adore some of the young writers and keep a close eye on their activities 😛
Now, after battling with myself for more than five long months to identify my purpose of being in this world, I am happy to discover myself. I know what my heart says. As they say,’It is only heart that matters’.
Live on! There is nothing more beautifully than living hopefully. Life has so much to offer than you can take! It is full of surprises. It is beyond comprehension of you and me. PERSEVERANCE is the key!